Who cares?

 Who cares?

The question that would always hold me back: Who the fuck cares? Who cares about my story? Who cares what I have to say? Why does anything I do matter? Nobody is gonna listen anyway. 

These lingering thoughts took hold of me and pulled me down for so long. The self doubt was undefeatable. I could not possibly convince myself that what I had to say mattered. I became inferior to others in my own eyes. I emphasized what others had over me in my own mind so much that I became the smallest, most useless person I knew. Then I thought to myself: what makes them any different than me? The answer: determination.

The people that I thought had it all together were in the exact same spot as me at some point in their lives. They were nothing to anyone at some point. But the biggest thing that makes them who they are is being determined to complete their goals no matter the cost.

I shifted my question from Why would they care? to Who cares? What’s the difference? One focuses on the negative aspect of people hating what I have to say or being completely apathetic. The other focuses on just doing it because why not? Who cares? When you ask yourself who cares you are confirming to yourself that the opinions of others don’t matter. You must do it for yourself. If you care, why would it matter if anyone else does?

A mindset shift. A complete change in my mentality on acceptance. Rather than chasing social acceptance I started chasing self acceptance. The depression I felt always trying to please others was exhausting. I escaped this depression when I started focusing on myself.

Pleasing others is so easy for some people. We think they have everything. We praise them because they have become praised by others. But these people still face depression. Why? They have it all together, don't they? No. They are sad because they don’t accept themselves. They focus on being everything for others, and they are nothing to themselves.

Happiness is a mindset that is dictated by your internal environment. Figure out how to create a positive internal environment and you will find true happiness in yourself. Once you have established this, then you can shine on the environment around you. 

Ask yourself, who cares? You care, that’s who cares. Now do it.

~Thank you for reading. My goal is to help teach others ways to better themselves while doing the same for myself. This is The Exploration.~