Finding what matters

“If it matters, you’ll find a way. If it doesn’t, you’ll find an excuse.”

Time is spent in millions of different ways.

Each person has specific things they do that occupy their time.

What may be important to them has no value to me.

I have worked hard to pin down the things that really matter to me. I have tried to find what I really want in life and only do things that give me what I want. What I have found out:

IT’S IMPOSSIBLE.

You can’t only do things that add purpose to your life. Trying to be productive (toward your purpose) 100% of the time is completely unrealistic. It simply cannot be done. Too many other forces, that you don’t control, get in the way of accomplishing what you feel you need.

Plus, trying to be structured 100% of the time will lead to burnout. Your mind can only focus so much. At some point in the day after deep work session after deep work session, your mind will no longer be able to focus. No matter how healthy you eat, how much sleep you got, how much water you drank, or even if you are using Adderall to focus (I hope not) you will reach burnout. 

Now that it is established that there are only so many hours in a day you can efficiently work on being the best version of you there is, you must ask yourself the question:

WHAT MATTERS MOST?

Ask yourself which things that you can do have a PROVEN, DIRECT IMPACT on fulfilling your overall purpose. These are the things that you have been doing for quite some time and have indicated that they are the most fulfilling things you can do. For me, my non-negotiable activities include 3 things:

• Writing

• Exercise

• Meditation

I was able to pin down these 3 activities as the most fulfilling because I have been doing them for some time and have felt the results. There are days where I have not been able to do some of these activities and I feel completely off. I have made these 3 activities a priority in my day because I know that they make me happier, which is my purpose.

I found this through trial and error. There are millions of people out there telling you what you should and shouldn’t do to become a better version of yourself. This is good and bad. Some people think that they should do exactly what somebody else does to be better, but as I said at the beginning, what makes them tick might not do it for you. You can use their activities as suggestions for things you can do, but you should never see what they do as commandments you need to follow.

Figure out what you want, try doing different things, see what works.

My biggest fear has always been “wasting time.” I always think that if it is not directly impacting what I want, it is a waste of time. I need to ditch this mindset. It is a mindset that gets me more stressed than anything. Stress will cause you to procrastinate and be unfocused.

Now, I have to ask myself:

HOW CAN I FILL AS MUCH TIME AS POSSIBLE DOING WHAT I NEED TO DO TO FULFILL MY PURPOSE?

It is more about time optimization than anything. Like I said, distractions will pop up, but it is more about what you do when you are not distracted than what the distractions make you do.

So rather than being upset your time is “wasted” when you aren’t able to do what you want, just make the most out of the time you do have for yourself. That way, at the end of the day you know you did all you could.

That’s the biggest thing. If you think you did everything you could at the end of the day, it is a win.

If it really is important to you, you’ll find a way to do it. You’ll make time. It may be hard, but you’ll make it happen.

If it’s not important, you will make excuses for why it didn’t happen.

Choose to fill your free time with things that matter. Make a list of priorities and start at the top and get as far down as you can.

Find out what matters to you, and do it as much as you can.

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Thank you for reading!

My goal is to inspire self-improvement in others through my personal stories and experiences.

This is The Exploration.