The Exploration

  Do better Improvement equals fulfillment. When we can feel like we are becoming better, a sense of completeness is born in our mind and our soul. Without improvement, it is harder to find a reason to wake up everyday. We all want to do better, but how can we consistently find a way to be better? The first step is establishing goals for yourself. You may say you want to be a better person but in what aspects of life do you want to be better? Recognize the areas of your life that you feel like you are lacking in and form ways of improving. Taking small steps toward being better in each category of life will make you a better person overall, but by putting a simple plan into place you are effectively eliminating any uncertainty of what you wish to achieve.  Once the goals are in place, you must set constant reminders. These reminders will help motivate and keep you focused each day. Without constant reminders there is no way to stay on the path you set out for yourself. In orde...

  Humility It takes humility to admit you are wrong. Owning failures is impossible for a prideful person. Failure to own your defeats leads you down a slippery slope. Blaming others for your faults will take you out of control of your own life. Why? Why would pride take you out of control? Because if you blame others for everything, you are saying that you have no impact on your life. You tell yourself that everything that has happened to YOU has been a result of someone else. As soon as you tell yourself that YOU are responsible, you will regain control. I spent too long blaming everyone else. I was too proud. I lacked confidence and lacked humility. As I saw it, I was given a hand that I had not dealt. I was allowing others to choose my cards. When I made plays, others were responsible. I began to fall down a bad path. A path where I was unhappy and couldn’t quite figure out why. By not owning my life, I was putting my happiness in the hands of others. And frankly, others don’t c...

  Follow your own path As days go by, events will take place that dictate the direction of your life. Certain moments will be tougher than others. The tough moments make you want to turn back or follow the path of others, but what we don’t realize is that those hard moments create the person you are. The decisions you make when those difficult moments arise are the decisions that create your story. Following the advice of others or the idea of being comfortable will never allow you to continue moving on the journey that is life.  I have been in situations where I hate my path. I want to do anything I can possibly do to jump ship. I want to speed up and get through the bad times. I began to realize that each moment we experience adds to the bigger picture. We are meant to go through what we go through so we can tell about it and grow from it. I spent too much time worrying about speeding up rather than just living my own life. I realized I must just follow my own path. Truth be...

  Comparison The best way of feeling like a failure is comparing yourself to others. It is nearly impossible for us to not feel envy. It is wired into our brains. Envy is good when it motivates, but it is detrimental when it demotivates. Use comparison as a tool to make you better rather than an ambition dampener. We have all heard the phrases “only compare you to you” and “don’t compare yourself to others.” Both are valid adages but is it even possible to only compare you to you? I’d say not. What is possible is comparing yourself to yourself when you look at progress and comparing yourself to others when searching for motivation. Other people are the driving force in most actions you take. Think of how little things you would do if you were the only person with an opinion. Our decisions are largely based on the interests and opinions of the people we spend the most time with. So why not use others as your comparison? When you see people you want to be like, you should ask yoursel...

  Renew Repetition creates perfection, but at the same time, it creates monotony. The repetition of habits will turn you into a master but to be a master you must be able to continue making progress. Habits are great, yes, but they do have their fallbacks. When you practice the same habits over time, there is no creativity, no reinvention. You are simply doing the same thing over and over again. Your imagination and creativity has been depleted and you start to get bored. The only thing keeping you going is the end goal. To combat this, we must make things new again. How can you renew old habits? Let’s find out. Reviving the drive to accomplish is not an easy thing to do. It requires effort and when effort is required, things are less likely to get done. That is why it is so easy to continue doing a habit that you have been doing for a long time; there is no change in effort. Rather than changing the effort you are putting in by adding more to your current habits, it is much easier...

  Getting back Breaks are necessary. To be able to work to our full capacity and ability we need breaks. After a long break from your habits, how do you get back on track? It is sometimes the hardest thing to do, but other times, it feels natural. Let’s talk about how to get back quickly and correctly. Usually after a long refreshing break we want to stay comfortable. For some people it depends on the time period, but for others they could be on eternal vacation. Your body has been accustomed to being comfortable and doing things that you usually don’t do.  Most people will try to break out of their vacation immediately when they want to get back to reality. This works for some. If you have created a routine, simply continue the routine you have created. If you have good habits in place your subconscious should continue following them.  But for those who have not created a routine or habits it is hard to leave vacation. The solution for this case lies in slowly adding in ...

  Always learn The biggest mistake I have learned is that you don’t have to be in the classroom to learn. Finding a way to learn constantly is what will separate you most from others. So how can one possibly learn all the time? Let’s dive in to find out. The amount that you can learn fluctuates based on what you are doing. The best opportunity you have to learn is when something is happening around you that you don’t know anything about. The smartest people will ask the most questions in these situations. Rather than assuming they can’t learn or being apathetic toward the activity, smart people will make an effort to learn what is going on. Trying to learn as much as you can will make you better versed and it will make boring times more entertaining. Many people will find themselves locked in monotonous conversations with a person that they don’t feel has anything to add. First of all, this is typically wrong. This person you feel knows nothing typical has some sort of value to add...

  Fate The longer I live, the more I feel like that fate is real. Certain moments seem rehearsed when they happen. The people you meet and the situations that arise feel like they were destined to happen. But I do not believe that fate is predetermined. I feel like fate is forever dynamic. The decisions you make throughout your life will lead to your fate. Small decisions in the short term may be drastic changes in the long run. Each small decision you make and action you take will bring you to your ultimate fate. Some may find this sentiment depressive. They may think that their life is completely predetermined. I argue the opposite. Some fates may be predetermined. Some things may happen regardless. But most fates can be influenced by what you do. Choose your own fate rather than letting it choose you. You want to feel in control? Make the decisions for yourself. Don’t let your life live you. An uneasiness will swell within you when it feels like you are losing control of your ow...

  Timing No time is ever the perfect time, it is up to you to make it the right time. This applies to all things in life. We often spend too much time waiting for the “right” time. We think that there is a best time to start rather than realizing that right now is the best time. We think that there is a best time to change even though right now is the best time to change. Some times are better for some things than others, this is true. But, you can create good timing. It is up to you to make the current time the right time. There are certain factors you can influence or you can change to make things work. I don’t think anything is impossible at any given time. If you are stuck thinking that something is impossible to do right now, you are simply making excuses for being lazy.  The situation you are in is a direct result of your choices. If the timing isn’t the best for you right now, that is because of something you have done. The opposite of that says that good timing is the ...

  Streaks Building habits takes work. Habits are a product of consistency over an extended period of time. Building habits requires streaks. After time, a streak will simply become second nature. Therefore, you have created a habit. But what happens when you miss? What happens when that streak is broken and you feel out of sorts? Never miss twice. Days may come where you break a good streak. You are trying to practice a new habit and things don’t go as planned. You have a variety of possible responses that can arise. One may include giving up on the habit because the streak is over. A streak takes time and consistency to build and once it breaks it is painful. You might think that it will be impossible to build the streak again once it has been broken. That is called giving in. Rather than giving in, exercise the opposite option: start a new streak. Starting a new streak should be easier than the first time because you have already proved to yourself that you can be consistent. Als...

  Humble confidence To be a leader, you must be confident in yourself. Others have to be able to trust you and your decisions. Confidence shows that they can put their trust in you and you will make the right decisions.  Can a leader be confident to a point where they lose respect? Most definitely. This is the purpose of humble confidence. Leaders are respected because they show they have the ability and confidence to lead. The ability to lead does not solely come from confidence, but also their ability to be humble.  Humble leaders make it easy for others to approach them. They create more leadership opportunities by giving others the ability to follow. It is hard to follow a leader who is too egoistic. An egoistic leader worries too much about themself to truly have a team mindset. Egoistic leaders may have the charisma and popularity, but they are nowhere near as effective as leaders with humble confidence. When working on humble confidence, envision your perception to...

  Mental cleansing Each day we fill our mind with a mountain of memories. Some are good, some are bad, some are beneficial, some are detrimental. At times our mind becomes filled with more bad and detrimental memories than good and beneficial. When this happens, we need to know how to clear out the mind.  Many strategies can be used. One of the best I have used is something I will refer to as resynchronization. Resynchronization requires resetting the mind. This includes avoiding anything that may distract the mind. Typically we want to declutter and reorganize so we must completely cut out any distractions. Meditation and focus periods are the best method used to resynchronize. In meditation, you must focus on leaving your other duties aside and completely focus on the moment. Doing this allows you to put things back into perspective and feel more in control of what is going on around you. Another way often used to clear out the mind is by decreasing your consumption of non-s...

  Choosing battles When to say something, and when to shut up. It is a decision we are constantly making. We must weigh out the benefits of both. The decision between the two is never clear. It can never be clear. Every decision on what to say and when is completely relative. Each decision will trigger a different response. As we mature, we must realize the importance of verbalization or non verbalization in every situation. When do you speak up? When is it necessary to say something? It is dependent on the situation. Each situation calls for a different response. The more times you have lived through a similar situation, the more experience you will have with how to handle it. Learn from the mistakes you make and learn how they could go over better. It is also important to observe others. Watching how people interact and approach each situation gives insight on how certain people may react. Each person is different, but by observing interpersonal situations more often, you begin t...

  Gaining respect Who do you respect? Think of a couple people that you have an immense amount of respect for. Now ask yourself, why do you respect them? It might be what they have accomplished, what they have overcome, who they have become, or how they present themselves. There are a plethora of things that can gain respect from peers. If you are looking to gain respect, you have to first think of the things that you respect about a person. Once you have figured out what makes you respect someone, you can then begin doing these things and you will, in turn, respect both yourself and make yourself more respectable. To earn respect from others, you must have already fully earned your own respect. Earning your own respect requires discipline. You must do things that make you proud of yourself. Build yourself into the person that you respect most. Do the things that others don’t do and you will be able to look up to yourself. For some, it is hard to truly become the person you look up...

  Optimize fear It is holding you back. It is keeping you from becoming the person you can be. It is a limitation that you must break through. It is fear. We all feel fear. Fear is a major reason why we avoid change. But change is the only way to become better. Change is what makes us better. Every new opportunity will give you a rush, that rush is adrenaline which typically means that you are anxious about something. Adrenaline triggers your body to jump into survival mode. In survival mode, that is when you can grow. In the face of fear, you grow more than ever. Today, I want to teach you to optimize fear. That feeling of uneasiness in your stomach when faced with something that you are not accustomed to is the feeling of fear. Think back to every single time you have experienced that feeling. That is what you felt on your first date. That is what you felt on the first day of your career. That is what you felt your first time being somewhere new. Your body was not prepared for th...

  Write your story Each person lives their own personal story. Everything that happens in your life is just a piece of your story. If you see your life through this lens, you will start to appreciate each day more and more. You will eventually start to live as if you were writing your own book. Why write a boring book? Construct a story that you want to read. Do things out of the ordinary because they will make for entertaining parts of your book. Branch out and meet new characters. Think of every single action you take and ask yourself, “Is this something my character would do?” Be your main character. You can control exactly what your character does. You have all the power. When I changed my mindset on each day, I was able to escape monotony. The daily actions I take have begun to foreshadow a bigger action that will happen in the future. I think of every action as character development that makes up the plot. Some of the chapters are not as entertaining as others, but they usual...

  Pay it forward I am blessed. I have lived my entire life with good fortune. I used to think that some people had it good, and others had it bad. I thought that was just how things were. I lived by the idea that everyone had an issue, but some were worse than others. A good life was given to me, so I should let others figure it out on their own. I was so wrong. I was given such a good life, yet I still couldn’t solve why I was sad or angry or disappointed. I could never get to the bottom of it. Now I realize the reason I was unhappy was because I kept my blessings for myself. You must pay it forward. Knowledge is power. Some people are given the capacity of acquiring knowledge quicker and retaining it better than others. The thing is, we all have knowledge on something. How do we learn what we know? Most of the time, we learn it from somebody else. Somebody who knows more than us. Rather than just keeping the information for themselves and letting somebody suffer through learning ...

  Authenticity Most people don’t enjoy the brutal, honest truth. In fact, most people would rather have the truth sugar coated so that it is easier to swallow. The issue is that by not saying what you actually mean, you are creating ambiguity. Ambiguity leads to weaker relationships, delayed disappointment, and increased anxiety. Ambiguity leads to weaker relationships. Straightforwardness and relationships go hand in hand. To form a stronger connection with someone, you have to tell them how you feel. Dancing around your feelings only creates uncertainty within both parties. Most people put on a facade that shadows their real feelings and only displays the more appealing sides of themself. We all know these people. The people who are inauthentic have a variety of relationships typically, but hardly any of them are deep. They find it more important to make friends than truly be honest and authentic with people. Therefore, their relationships suffer.  Ambiguity leads to delayed...

  Importance of the beginning  Without a solid start, momentum can not be built, and there is no hope for a successful finish. That is why we must create a solid beginning to anything we do. No matter what it is, the beginning and the way we start is absolutely crucial for how the entire process goes. There are 3 major timelines that I consider to have very crucial beginnings. The 3 that come to my head are the daily timeline, the weekly timeline, and the yearly timeline. As humans, we like a fresh start. For some reason, the beginning of the year seems like a much more appealing place to begin than the middle of a month in the middle of the year. That is why we must prepare for these beginnings. The daily timeline has the shortest turnaround. Every single morning you make choices on how your entire day will go. That is why it is so important that you prepare for a successful day. This requires us to set up for it the day before. Going to bed late or indulging in alcohol the n...

  Zoned Disappear into a state of complete, laser focus. Once you have achieved this state, nothing can distract you from your goals. Now the question is, how can we achieve this state? Let’s dig in. Focusing is difficult now. Constant notifications and distractions have made it nearly impossible to maintain any state of stillness. In order to avoid this, you must escape. But where do you escape to? Not everybody has the ability to travel somewhere sublime where they can find peace. The answer: you must escape into your own mind. This is an art that I have practiced for quite some time. I discovered ways to make myself fall into an absolute daze with no substance to augment it. This daze would create a laser focus that would make me completely in tune with my own mind. The first step is realizing you can just let the world live around you. You do not need to know who’s doing what at every second of every day. This applies to public places too. I used to get so caught up in how I ap...

  Managing emotion People don’t remember what you say, they remember how you made them feel. This is a statement that has stuck with me through everything. If the words you say make a person feel a certain way, especially if it is a strong feeling of emotion, they will remember it as clear as day in their mind. With this in mind, I can remember countless times where my personal emotions have become so strong and caused me to say something that people will remember.  Is it always bad to say what you think? I don’t think so. But it is important to manage the emotions you are feeling so you can determine if you are thinking straight or not. Words have left my mouth that I cannot take back. Maybe I didn’t actually mean what I said, but I said it. The words traveled through someone else’s mind and they were interpreted in some sort of way. If the feeling they felt was strong, the memory will be vivid in their minds for quite some time. When you feel strongly about something, gauge ...

  Become an example I used to think being introverted kept me from being a leader. The spotlight never appealed to me, I didn’t like being the center of attention. I wanted to live under the radar as much as I could and be unrecognized. Then I realized I had a gift that not everyone had. I have an ability to connect with people emotionally and motivate them. Being an emotional person, I thought that these emotions always held me back. I always asked myself why I cared so much about other people. I would see others in pain and I would cry because I felt like I needed to help them. As I grew, I started taking full advantage of my ability. I realized that I can be the one to influence people, to grow people, to make people feel good about themselves. So I did just that, I began to live the same way I had been living, but being the hype man for the people closest to me. They acknowledged the fact that I helped them form a better version of themselves by believing in them. It made me fe...

  Yesterday If I told myself a year ago that I would be where I am today, I would laugh. I truly thought that I was stuck in an endless cycle that I would experience until the end of time. I had no idea that the life I saw in my dreams could be the life I’d live someday. I am inspired. Adopting a mindset of endless growth will make waking up exciting every single day. I told myself to just be better than yesterday. I started disappointed in myself, I was underwhelmed with where I was and truly angry at the world for putting me through it. Changes would be made for a day, then slowly things would shift back to ordinary. Monotony everyday. I hated where I was. Yesterday became a stepping stone for today. “Yesterday I was this good, so today I will be better.” Slowly, progress would just fall into my hands. It became impossible to slow down because every single movement upward inspired me to go higher.  Small, consistent movements forward are much better than big, sporadic leaps....